Where is the silver lining?

- edit : My Ah Kong past away yesterday at around 10:00pm, 29 January 2010 in the presence of his children. Unfortunately, I didn't make it back in time -

Amidst the exhilarating rush of wedding planning and overseeing the renovation works of our new place, I sometimes feel a pang of guilt, sorrow, and regret. You see, my Grandad (whom I fondly call Ah Kong) is critically ill at home in Seremban, my Popo has been admitted into IJN for infection of the valve, and my uncle is in the hospital for some follow-up treatment subsequent to his major operation back in December. I have been running to and fro 3 different hospitals since last month! And will be 'celebrating' Chinese New Year in the hospital with my Popo and in Seremban with my Ah Kong, who is bedridden.

I feel guilty because I shouldn't be feeling so joyous when people close to me is in sickness. Sorrow because I don't understand why calamity has been bestowing upon my family - one after another. There seem to be no end.

Regretful because I know my Ah Kong will not be able to stay long enough to witness my wedding ceremony. I know I shouldn't be saying this but this is a fact. And facts always hurt. He is deteriorating so fast day by day. Every week when we go and visit him, he seems so much worse off. It is heart-wrenching. And above all, he won't be there sitting at the front row in church witnessing me reciting my vows. There will be one empty seat left on the VIP table in Marriott. How can this happen? I cannot comprehend.

Sometimes, I feel that God has been really cruel to me and my family. Why inflict sickness? Why let my family members go through the suffering? I really don't understand. I really don't. I know the mechanics of me needing to trust God and to let His will be done.

Let me tell you. No one will understand the current situation that I am in. I want to trust God, I really do. But I can't. I tried and I just can't. I need an explanation!! Sometimes trusting alone is not enough.

Honestly, I am sad that my Ah Kong will not be part of my big day. I really am. I am sad that I will not see him in any of my wedding photographs.

I really do hope that my Popo will be strong enough and I pray that at least she will be able to see me on my wedding day and if God willing, to see me giving birth to my child - her great grandchild.

They say in every cloud/thunderstorm/rain, there is always a silver lining. I need to see the silver lining. Desperately.

Signing Off.

Fresh Prince of Gasing Indah

Dear all,

May I introduce to you the latest addition to the family:

PRINCE !!!

One year old Miniature Schnauzer, given away by his previous owner because the management in her condo evicted him. The original name given to him was Magic. Er... which explains why we changed it to Prince. He knows nifty tricks such as sit, down, bang-die!, crawl, roll, and hand shakes.

Such a darling, isn't he?


Love;
The Bride-To-Be

Bridesmaid Dresses

So you know that I have appointed my coolies chosen ones for my wedding day and now the time has come for me to choose their dresses! How exciting! In Stephie's words of wisdom, it would be better if I suggest the necklines for the girls - of course they have to see it and agree with it. Reason is simple; first is to make sure that the wedding party has some kind of a coordination, secondly so that it fits my budget.

Of course, all the colors of the dresses will follow my theme color - i.e. green and pink! The dresses are short, A-Line cutting with a ribbon across the waist. All dresses will be bare-backed. The material will be Duchess Satin. Exactly like below:

Let's start with Florence first. Since she will be the Chief Bridesmaid who won't be able to make it for the banquet dinner, she will have the privilege to be different from the other two girls. She will be the one walking in front just before me. She will have to be the alert one to pass me tissue when I cry or sweat. To make sure there is no lipstick stain on my teeth. To make sure that the train of my gown is always aligned and I won't trip on my own gown. Now, that is tough work ya, hence I have to bribe reward her by differentiating her dress right?? Anyway, it would be easier to spot her should the need arise.

For her, I have decided a sweetheart neckline. Her dress will be in pastel pink instead of pastel green. I intend to use pastel green ribbons, but somehow I find that the color doesn't match. It looks odd! Erm ... I think we may either use a darker shade of pink or white for the ribbon. The reason why I chose sweetheart neckline was because the other two girls will have straps, and I think she actually looks sexy good in that cutting! And Flo, enough of being so covered up ok!!


Secondly, for Mun Yee I gave a choice of either halter-neck or V-neck. She chose V-neck. The reason being, she is very tall and has big bone structures, especially her broad shoulders. I think that these cuttings will accentuate her features more as she has the height (jealous!!!) to pull off the look for the dress. It will look so elegant on her!


Thirdly, for Angie it was pretty simple. I roughly know what kind of a style she liked and proceeded to choose a strap one for her. Thank God she loved it! Apparently she feels that it makes her boobs bigger (-__-") and will tone down her broad shoulders/arms (?!). Since when is it broad by the way? Are you over-reacting babe?? Her only concern is that if the dress is low at the back, it will reveal her scars. Well, I told her no problem if she is not comfortable then we can always ask the tailor to adjust the back. If you ask me, I like her design because it looks flirty and sweet!



Well, there you go. The girls with their chosen necklines. Do you think it will clash?? I certainly hope not!! I will be bringing them to Neoromantic Bridal end of March to take their measurements. The dresses should be ready in 2 months' time and I hope the outcome will not be disappointing, or I will be pissed. The last time round when I did my dress, the final product was really not up to expectation despite it being MTM and I was utterly unhappy.

The reason why I am doing their dresses so early is because Neoromantic had increased their pricing since my inquiry last year, and they intend to increase their prices again middle of this year!!! :( I HAVE A BUDGET TO ADHERE TO WAN LEH!!!!!

Yup, that's it. The latest development in the planning process. :)


Love;
The-Bride-To-Be

10 Months Before the Wedding ...

Alright ... and we are 10 months to the wedding date! My goodness time flies! Here is my checklist:

1) Cofirm and book your venues if you haven't done so.

Done!

2) Select your wedding party and inform them of their duties.

Done! Except for flower girls, best man, and ring bearer. I think the bridesmaids will know their duties kua *hint* *hint*

3) Plan your CD music selection or ask for quotes for entertainment bands.

This is Bear's section. So I will leave it for him to organise. By the way, I have asked for quotes from the bands, still pending if we want to hire one for the dinner banquet or not.

4) Select bridal bouquet, followed by bridal gown and suits.

All these will be done when I select my wedding gown for AD in August. Provided by the bridal house. Not sure if Bear wants to tailor make a suit or not. Talk about being vain! :p

5) Search for reputable MUA.

Done!

6) Start shopping for wedding party's attire.

We will be heading to Neoromantic Bridal for measurements of the bridesmaids dress end of this March. They have chosen their necklines. So excited! Hopefully everything will turn out perfect!

7) Shop for bridal accessories.

Provided by the bridal house and my MUA.

8) Help mother of the bride and groom choose their dresses.

Er ... help (?!) *clueless*

9) Plan your program, check out printers, and get quotations for order of service for church ceremony.

I think we will do this at a later date. I have the tentative itinerary for the church ceremony. We know where to get the order of service template. Maybe printing can ask church to help?

10) Research and book your photographer / videographer.

Done!

Not bad eh?

It seems like we have completed most tasks. So excited !!!!

Love;

The Bride-To-Be

Resolution

Now, I don't usually never do this but here it goes:

Work:
(1) Tolerate my working colleagues (as much as I could)
(2) Do not procastinate!!
(3) Plan ahead / Time management
(4) Try to achieve beyond what my KPI targets are
(5) Be more proactive / outgoing (stop being timid!!!)
(6) Have a spririt of excellence in the things I do

Relationship:
(1) Learn to appreciate those closest to me
(2) Adjust to being a Mrs. Lee :)
(3) Learn to trust Bear as the head of the family
(4) Try as much as I can to blend in with Bear's side of the family

Others:
(1) Be a good and efficient wedding planner
(2) Learn to cook
(3) Be wise in spending

Erm.. that should be all for now.

Love;
The-Bride-To-Be