They say that time flies when you are having fun. Couldn't have agreed more. It is quite unbelievable that me and Bear is already married for 1 year (prior to this, was courting for 7 years!). I can still remember vividly our wedding day and our 7 years of courtship .. it all seems only like yesterday. Of course in this past year, we do argue and have our disagreements because we are still adapting to each other idiosyncrasies. How do we manage so far? Well here is a 101 on marriage - based on my own experience, the top 5 items in the order of what we disagree the most.
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| Church Wedding @ 09/10/2010 |
(5) Household Chores.
Yes, believe it or not we do sometimes bicker about this. Honestly, I for one do not like household chores who does? but I will still do it anyway at my own time. Yes, the key word is at my own time. Sometimes, my husband will come back and pass a comment like "Eh, the clothes are not folded yet.. can you do it soon?" or sometimes "We better mop/sweep/vacuum the floor today etc". If I don't have the mood for it, I won't do it because I simply don't feel like it. Having said that, I would always make sure that whatever that is needed to be done, is done. Eventually.
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| Mount Cook, NZ |
Solution: Communication! We talk about it. The husband is also kind enough to understand where I'm coming from. To me, most importantly, no matter how I procrastinate I will still get the chores done because it is what I've promised to do. Eventually. :)
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| Phi-Phi Island |
(4) Habits.
This is something that is unavoidable because you have two different individuals staying together. There are bound to be frictions. There are bound to be things which I find extremely irritating about. Likewise for the husband too. For e.g. he loves to drink straight from the carton, I don't condone to that because it is unhygienic. Or for me, I am quite careless and has a habit of leaving things lying around, yes he does lecture me quite a few times.
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| Goofing around in the house |
Solution: Sometimes it is good to overlook on trivial things. After all, your husband comes in a package deal - you take the good, you take the bad also. However, when there are certain habits that is impossible for you to overlook, it is good to bring it up and discuss about it. But most of the time, you just close one eye and ignore la .. focus on the good attributes only.
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| Singapore |
(3) Priorities.
Before marriage, both of you have your own things to do in your spare time, which doesn't include your spouse. For my husband, it is his Monday futsal and Wednesday badminton time with his boys. Of course, I don't oppose to it. But initially when I was married to him, he comes back home really late after his sessions curi go to the mamak I presume. Also, due to the nature of his job, occasionally he tends to work late on weekdays. It came to a point that was so bad that I actually spent more time with my parents (thank God I stay real near to my parents' place) than with my own husband. He also had this weird habit of sleeping outside in the living hall. -_-"
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| Church |
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| Honeymoon in Jeju Island, Korea |
Solution: Before I meletup at his face, I sat him down and explained the situation to him. He was really understanding and tried to make a change so that he spends more time at home. Now he still goes for his boys' thingy but he would regulate his timing as well. Word of caution: NEVER EVER STOP YOUR HUSBAND FROM HAVING HIS ALONE BOYS' TIME!!!
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| Lake Tekapo, NZ |
(2) Submission.
We've been taught in church that the wife is to submit to the husband as he is the head of the house. Likewise, the husband is to love the wife as how Christ loves us. And let me tell you, submission is not easy especially if you are a working career-minded woman who is used to having things her way. Also, sometimes when I wanna go clubbing with my colleagues he may not allow me, but I will usually die-die also go wan la. Yes, I am still learning ok!
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| Wedding dinner in Putrajaya Marriott @ 10/10/10 |
Solution: In this category, I don't think I fare that badly. To me, it is important to discuss everything with your husband first, not to seek approval, but to get his concurrence and his views/opinions on the subject matter. Remember, there can only be one decision-maker in the house.
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| 12 Apostles, Melbourne |
(1) Finances
Really really sensitive issue. Every couple will fight and argue over it. Who is to handle the finances of the house? Who is to pay what? Are you suppose to split right down to the middle? Can you trust your spouse with your money? Is he hiding anything from you? Is he spending for his own personal consumption? All these questions do plague me once in awhile, I can't help it.
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| Honeymoon in Seoul, Korea |
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| Random Picture |
Solution: Talk about it. When it comes to finances, be open and discuss your concerns. Share your thoughts. It is very important to nip the problem in the bud than to let it escalate. The issue of finances can break a marriage.
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| Engagement Shoot |
All in all, communication is the most important thing in a marriage. Trust comes a close second. We both are still in the first leg of marriagehood, there would be many more joy, happiness, tears, and arguments that will come our way. But, I am confident that we will be able to sail through them because through these experience, it will make only make us appreciate our marriage more.
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| Phuket, Thailand ... |
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| Where he proposed back in 31 May 2009 <3 |
To the most loving, understanding, goofy, and snoring husband of mine. Here's to a long happy marriage and I love you despite the weight gain. Happy First Year Anniversary *muaks~!*
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| Muaks .. Love you lots busuk bear :) |
Love;
Mrs Lee
wonder if I will have a dragon baby or not?
